The big question is, what makes such a relationship work? How does a married couple find balance in such a lifestyle? What must each spouse be prepared for or be willing to sacrifice? These questions and more is what this post is all about.
The quintessential aspect of such a relationship is security in the marriage to begin with. A relationship that is already rocky will falter. The next area for success is non-jealousy. This is a big one. The husband must like the idea of seeing his beloved with another guy. It has to turn him on and not make him upset. We as men are programmed to be competitive and want to be better that the guy next to us. To have your wife in the arms of a better lover, a guy who makes her wild in bed and satisfies her more than you is a huge thing to deal with on an emotional level.
You may think it’s going to be great, but you may find that it hurts way too much. You can’t sacrifice your spirit for the sake of a sexual thrill. The swinging open marriage let your wife play lifestyle is and has to be all about strengthening your marriage and making both partners excited and thrilled to be so adventurous and open minded. If it makes your marriage better, it works. If it hurts is stop immediately and move on.
The hotwife must desire extra sex. There is no need to put emotions on the line if sex is not desired. In this case the husband realizes he is not the lover that can completely satisfy his wife. He may have issues or she may have issues. Either way, the idea of an extra lover who is a stud and very capable of bringing the wife to greater heights is desired. The issues could be age difference, the husband’s impotence, or perhaps premature ejaculation. He could be small in penile size compared to his wife, and or he could be injured, ill, or incapable of the energy needed to make his bride get wild in bed.
This does not mean they are not in love or that they can’t have a sexual relationship; it only means he or she or both desire more for her. Sex is a primal instinct. Why not make it reach it’s fullest potential?
She may just love more sex than the husband can offer or give. She may be multi-orgasmic through long rounds of intercourse, or by other means able to get off many times in one evening. She may be larger in organ size, and her husband’s smaller member may not be able to fulfill her carnal cravings. She may just want more sex than the man she loves can deliver.
All the above can lead to a great cuckold and hotwife relationship and to the seeking of a bull or stud to bring it all to a crescendo. However boundaries must be set. Each and every relationship in this regard needs certain rules. For example, kissing becomes an issue. Should the wife be allowed to French kiss her lovers? This may seem trivial, but it’s one of the biggest issues a couple will face. French kissing is extremely intimate and evokes strong emotions. Another huge issue is when and where, and is the cuckold allowed to always be present? The answer to this varies from couple to couple. The spouse must agree on this wholeheartedly.
The next issue is condom or no condom. We all know guys hate condoms. It again may seem like something that will work itself out, but in the heat of the moment and with a raging hard-on pointing right at your wife’s soaking pussy, she may forgo all thoughts of a condom, as will her bull.
There are more issues. Who does the setting up of the encounters, the phone calls, the emails? The husband and wife should make all this very clear prior to embarking on the hotwife lifestyle. Couples have different views again on these subjects. Another big one is how many times will the couple allow a bull to play with the wife? The more they fuck, the more they bond, and the more emotionally complicated things get. I have met with bulls that tell me stories that would scare the crap out of all prospective cuckolds wanting to give out their beautiful sexy wives for more nights of erotica with a more advanced sexual stud. One told me this, “I have had so many wives and girlfriends tell me they would leave their man in a minute to be with me.” They ask to have secret meetings, just us two.” If this doesn’t scare my fellow cuckold husbands I can’t think of what would. My point is, be firm and be very detailed about all these issues.
If the relationship is strong and ground rules are set, the experiences can be amazing. There’s nothing quite like seeing the woman you love sexual charged. Seeing her brought to heights unimaginable is beyond words. You will fall in love with her all over again. You will cherish her so much. The bond you share will grow leaps and bounds. The two of you will shop more together and laugh more together. You will go on trips and grand adventures like never before. It will bring you much closer as a couple.
A hotwife in such a setting usually will feel as though it makes her feel very feminine and adored. She will get the best of both worlds – the stability of a loving traditional relationship with a husband and kids, plus the uninhibited sexual freedom and exploration that is always available whenever she wants it.
Here’s what every good couple in the lifestyle should have in what I call “The Adventure Bag.”
1. Condoms of all sizes – for us magnum XL was the brand we preferred.
2. Breathe mints- great for during or after oral sex for your bull to use.
3. Lubrication. Astroglide is the most natural.
4. Rolaids in case of an upset tummy.
5. Small wine bottles- great liquid courage and a little ice on hand.
6. Small hard liquor to mix with soda from vending machines.
7. Music via an pod and a small speaker playing system.
8. Digital camera and or video player- charge your batteries ahead.
9. Small vials of perfume for the hotwife to freshen up and or have on hand.
10. Viagra on hand never hurts, true bulls rarely use it.
11. Aleve for tension headaches.
12. Snacks like pretzels and always a chocolate bar for the hotwife afterward.
13. Bottled Water- very important to have on hand.
14. A lint roller to brush clothing up.
15. Bottle opener.
16. A Lighter.
17. Listerine Pocket Paks.
18. A Pen for contact information just in case someone new comes along.
19. A GPS, this tool helps any traveling to meet your stud much easier.
20. Your hotwife’s favorite toy- just in case things go wrong!
In closing the lifestyle of cuck and hotwife is an amazing journey of emotions and sexual freedom. The adventures within our lasting memories that can bring a married couple closer and enhance a marriage in many many ways. The biggest issue is that your relationship must already be strong to begin on such a journey. As a couple always be patient. Be VERY patient, but don’t ever lower your standards. I hope above all else –you enjoy the ride. -DH